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Bonce The Massive Gobshite

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boltonbonce
Natasha Whittam
6 posters

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1Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Bonce The Massive Gobshite Mon Mar 07 2022, 19:33

Natasha Whittam

Natasha Whittam
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

So a few weeks ago Bonce says he's made his last post due to shabby treatment meted out by the bellend mods. In an act of solidarity I decided to stop posting.

But I didn't leave it at that. I glued myself to Slough Town Hall, grassed up the occupants of the queue behind the BB bins to their wives, and took a dump on BTID's seat at the Macron before every home game - all as a protest against their heavy handed treatment of Bonce.

But after logging on by accident (I meant to type Chorley Nuts) what did I find? All is forgotten and Bonce is braiding the Mods' hair and singing Kumbaya round the BB bins.

The man is a massive fuckwit, his word means nothing.

Please ignore him from now on.



Last edited by Natasha Whittam on Mon Mar 07 2022, 22:05; edited 1 time in total

2Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Mon Mar 07 2022, 20:09

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Natasha Whittam wrote:So a few weeks ago Bonce says he's made his last post due to shabby treatment meted out by the bellend mods. In an act of solidarity I decided to stop posting.

But I didn't leave it at that. I glued myself to Slough Town Hall, grassed up the occupants of the queue behind the BB bins to their wives, and took a dump on BTID's seat at the Macron before every home game - all as a protest against their heavy handed treatment of Bonce.

But after logging on by accident (I meat to type Chorley Nuts) what did I find? All is forgotten and Bonce is braiding the Mods' hair and singing Kumbaya round the BB bins.

The man is a massive fuckwit, his word means nothing.

Please ignore him from now on.
Outrageous!
You come back in here, twirling your tassels, and have the nerve to accuse ME of being a fuckwit. You know very well you promised to help me get my hair salon up and running.
And after one day, I find you've opened your own place up the road, with sun beds to boot.
Not only that, you'd persuaded Alphonso, my main stylist, to join you.
How you must have laughed over the curlers, as you made your plans. Is it any wonder I returned to Nuts, for comfort?
Alphonso blanked me at the penile dysfunction clinic yesterday. I hope you're happy.
However, You can't help who you are, and, in light of that, I forgive you.
Welcome home, you back stabbing old cow.

3Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Mon Mar 07 2022, 21:43

Sluffy

Sluffy
Admin

Natasha Whittam wrote:So a few weeks ago Bonce says he's made his last post due to shabby treatment meted out by the bellend mods. In an act of solidarity I decided to stop posting.

But I didn't leave it at that. I glued myself to Slough Town Hall, grassed up the occupants of the queue behind the BB bins to their wives, and took a dump on BTID's seat at the Macron before every home game - all as a protest against their heavy handed treatment of Bonce.

But after logging on by accident (I meat to type Chorley Nuts) what did I find? All is forgotten and Bonce is braiding the Mods' hair and singing Kumbaya round the BB bins.

The man is a massive fuckwit, his word means nothing.

Please ignore him from now on.

Wow, I never knew it was you who was glued to the old Town Hall, I just thought  you were some old bag lady taking shelter in the empty offices now that the new Town Hall opened two years ago.

In fact I took pity on you and tried to give you some items of food (although I did think you were by far the fattest tramp I had ever seen) and you threw the kit kat and the bottle of coke I'd brought for you back at me demanding I bring Twirls and Pepsi next time - how ungrateful of you I thought but I cut you some slack as you must have had gone through some horrendous incident at some point in your life to have such a lopsided bosom?

Still you've solved the mystery of who was singing the "Some one scored a goal, John Byrom" song behind the back of the BB off licence - they were dreadfully out of tune too. I much prefer the Lion Sleeps Tonight song myself, you can't go too far wrong singing that.

Anyway belated best wishes for your birthday just gone, I would have started a thread for you actually but I'd been called in by Sharon to see if I could solve the mystery of the Unibol seat shitter.  The CCTV has caught some blurry pictures of someone looking like Lurch from the Adams family and I clearly thought it was the phantom poo person in disguise.

Having now seen you outside the old Town Hall I now realise that they weren't blurry pictures at all and that you weren't in disguise either!

Uggghhhh!!!

4Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Mon Mar 07 2022, 22:08

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Do I have to look at the title of this thread all week?
It's a disgrace.
My character is being assassinated in full view.
I've not been this angry since Norpig got his record player fixed.

5Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Tue Mar 08 2022, 13:09

Norpig

Norpig
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

boltonbonce wrote:Do I have to look at the title of this thread all week?
It's a disgrace.
My character is being assassinated in full view.
I've not been this angry since Norpig got his record player fixed.
Don't make me post some of my current favourites you massive gobshite  Very Happy

6Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Tue Mar 08 2022, 14:30

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

At last, a chef I understand.

7Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Tue Mar 08 2022, 16:41

wanderlust

wanderlust
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Bonce The Massive Gobshite 275562217_10159204932451843_4408078596929474901_n.jpg?_nc_cat=100&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=5cd70e&_nc_ohc=ufCNCRessT4AX_iUkPI&tn=5yuoXbobA6ZlBDjm&_nc_ht=scontent-man2-1

8Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Tue Mar 08 2022, 16:44

wanderlust

wanderlust
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Bonce The Massive Gobshite 274096291_1591822261196614_751815878919162680_n.jpg?_nc_cat=109&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=5cd70e&_nc_ohc=fDbk9If0gqoAX_OxwtO&_nc_ht=scontent-man2-1

9Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Tue Mar 08 2022, 18:31

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Right, why is this thread now a sticky!!!?

10Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Tue Mar 08 2022, 19:16

Norpig

Norpig
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

boltonbonce wrote:Right, why is this thread now a sticky!!!?

My money's on that wrongun KP  Very Happy

11Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Tue Mar 08 2022, 19:56

karlypants

karlypants
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Norpig wrote:
boltonbonce wrote:Right, why is this thread now a sticky!!!?

My money's on that wrongun KP  Very Happy

Not guilty. Very Happy

12Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Tue Mar 08 2022, 20:53

Sluffy

Sluffy
Admin

karlypants wrote:
Norpig wrote:
boltonbonce wrote:Right, why is this thread now a sticky!!!?

My money's on that wrongun KP  Very Happy

Not guilty. Very Happy

Cool

lol!

13Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Wed Mar 09 2022, 20:17

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

No longer a sticky. And a good job. My lawyers were straining at the leash. Cool

14Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Wed Mar 09 2022, 20:29

Natasha Whittam

Natasha Whittam
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Who took your photo for your avatar?

15Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Wed Mar 09 2022, 20:44

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Natasha Whittam wrote:Who took your photo for your avatar?
Not bad is it? No idea who the old biddy is.

16Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Wed Mar 09 2022, 21:04

karlypants

karlypants
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Laughing

17Bonce The Massive Gobshite Empty Re: Bonce The Massive Gobshite Thu Mar 10 2022, 01:37

wanderlust

wanderlust
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

boltonbonce wrote:
Not bad is it? No idea who the old biddy is.
Barbara Cartland?

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