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World Ping Pong Championships

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Norpig
karlypants
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81World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Tue Mar 31 2020, 08:23

Ten Bobsworth


El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf

Here's a  little poem written by a different accountant a few years ago.

He'd been investigating the Chairman and wife of an NHS Trust who thought it was nice to have a large slice of the lucre within his influence or control.

Anyone ever asked you to be on an Audit Committee, Boncey? Me neither.
Who's the guy on Nuts with one glass eye? Two would be better but it might do for a start.


THE AUDIT COMMITTEE

 
He said to her, ‘Honey, just think of the money
We’ve banked and paid so little tax.
Why should we take pity on any committee
That’s gormless, dim-witted or lax?
 
It’s been such a pleasure to hoard all the treasure
Without any PAYE
And much more relaxing when not very taxing
And half of the dosh comes to me.
 
And it’s good to rely on a friendly blind eye
When there’s something that’s much better hidden
And if Fiddle-de-Dee want to earn their large fee
Some questions are strictly forbidden.
 
I’ve gone to great pains to keep secret our gains
Regardless of law or diktat
Compliance with rules is strictly for fools
And we are above all of that.’
 
‘My sweet, you’re so clever I doubt that they’ll ever
Unravel   your masterly scheme
Your admirable charm will always disarm
So no wonder it worked like a dream
 
But do you not think that while we’re in the pink
The gravy train must be kept running
If money is tight let’s be up for the fight,
And re-double our craft and our cunning.
 
But for now let us raise our glasses in praise
Of our splendid and fine NHS
Our fortune depends, on how much it spends
And how much of it we can access.’

82World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Tue Mar 31 2020, 09:33

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

83World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Tue Mar 31 2020, 10:40

Ten Bobsworth


El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf

Btw Boncey, he'd got away with it for about seven years before he was eventually removed from office, quietly.

No announcement, but when the local newspaper asked for comments he told the reporter that he'd stepped down because he disagreed with government policy.

He got a lovely obituary in The Guardian a few weeks later. 90% hogwash, of course, but his entire  adult life seemed to have been 90% hogwash.

What happened to him or the money? That's another story.

So is this, but there is a connection.

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/fallon-inquiry-ashworth-run-by-inmates-not-staff-1046694.html

84World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Tue Mar 31 2020, 12:04

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Been watching Seinfeld this week. Very Happy

85World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Tue Mar 31 2020, 12:44

Ten Bobsworth


El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf

Very interesting, Boncey, but not quite as interesting imo as how some stupid and some intelligent folk are easily fooled into believing the most crass things.

The first book I got a mention in (OK there's only been two) was written by an Emeritus Professor of History at one of the UK's top universities. It was complimentary but the relevant chapter was almost total garbage from start to finish.

No garbage in the other book though, but that author isn't a Professor.



Last edited by Ten Bobsworth on Tue Mar 31 2020, 13:15; edited 1 time in total

86World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Tue Mar 31 2020, 13:14

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Ten Bobsworth wrote:Very interesting, Boncey, but not quite as interesting imo as how some stupid and some intelligent folk are easily fooled into believing the most crass things.

The first book I got a mention in was written by an Emeritus Professor of History at one of the UK's top universities. It was complimentary but the relevant chapter was almost total garbage from start to finish.
I was once mentioned in a book by Professor Dr Hans-Ulrich Wittchen, but it's not something I like to talk about.

I well remember his last words to me at the end of a telephone conversation of some considerable length, "Leave me alone, I'm calling the police".

Quite a character, but his English wasn't great.

87World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Tue Mar 31 2020, 14:22

Ten Bobsworth


El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf

I don't wish to pry but which category were you in?

Substance dependence

 Alcohol dependence 12
 Illicit substance dependence 6 

Psychotic disorders 6

 Mood (affective) disorders
  Depressiona

  Bipolar disorder


Anxiety disorders
 Panic disorder


 Agoraphobia


 Social phobia 
 GAD


 Specific phobias 

 OCD


Somatoform disorders


Eating disorders



Last edited by Ten Bobsworth on Sat Apr 11 2020, 08:40; edited 1 time in total

88World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Tue Mar 31 2020, 15:49

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

All of them. What a Face

89World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Tue Mar 31 2020, 16:33

Ten Bobsworth


El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf

boltonbonce wrote:All of them. What a Face
I'm sorry, Boncey, but I think you are fibbing. If you can stomach Dale Vince and one of his pies you may have some mental incapacity but not an eating disorder.

90World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Tue Mar 31 2020, 16:39

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Ten Bobsworth wrote:
boltonbonce wrote:All of them. What a Face
I'm sorry, Boncey, but I think you are fibbing. If you can stomach Dale Vince and one of his pies you may have some mental incapacity but not an eating disorder.
If all you say about Mr Vince is true, I'm pretty certain that Ken has posters of him all over his bedroom. He must stand in awe before him.

91World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Tue Mar 31 2020, 20:15

Ten Bobsworth


El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf

boltonbonce wrote:
Ten Bobsworth wrote:
boltonbonce wrote:All of them. What a Face
I'm sorry, Boncey, but I think you are fibbing. If you can stomach Dale Vince and one of his pies you may have some mental incapacity but not an eating disorder.
If all you say about Mr Vince is true, I'm pretty certain that Ken has posters of him all over his bedroom. He must stand in awe before him.
I really don't know, Boncey. I also don't know whether Owen Oyston was an admirer of Robert Maxwell.

But speaking of the Ashworth scandal, how long do you think that our hero's grieving widow took before she set about extracting the lucre from the company they'd set up? PDQ as I recall but for some reason the records aren't available.

92World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Thu Apr 02 2020, 09:35

Ten Bobsworth


El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf

During my visit yesterday to the Companies House site (checking up on Charlton), Boncey, I also had another quick look to see how long it was before the NHS 'accumulations' were extracted from the company and the company liquidated.

Interestingly, to me at least, Companies House records have all been deleted related to the company concerned but faster than you could say 'Paul Robinson' is my recollection of what actually happened.

93World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Fri Apr 03 2020, 10:57

Ten Bobsworth


El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf

Chester's been out of action for a few days. In hospital with kidney stones but back home again now. Hope he stays well.



'This was my ward in Torbay hospital they have let me home I had five nurses to myself the staff were great'

World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 EUMqEi7XQAUuCqk?format=jpg&name=small

94World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Sat Apr 04 2020, 13:00

Ten Bobsworth


El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf

Necessity is the mother of invention. Here's Chester's solution to the PPE shortage.

World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 ETybLqWXQAAztMi?format=jpg&name=small

95World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Sat Apr 04 2020, 13:07

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

96World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Sat Apr 04 2020, 13:11

Ten Bobsworth


El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf

boltonbonce wrote:
I think she's saying, ''You can't go to Asda looking like that."

What's he saying?

97World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Sat Apr 04 2020, 13:34

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

He's explaining his porn screenplay of Alien.

98World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Fri Apr 10 2020, 08:12

Ten Bobsworth


El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf

Chester's been unusually quiet since he came out of hospital. I hope he's OK.

I know he likes to thumb through his photo album. Here's one he published recently

World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 EUhlmp3XsAANvDy?format=jpg&name=small

And another earlier photo of two of the aforementioned.
Can you name them?

World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 EQRHzF0XYAAkbPZ?format=jpg&name=small

99World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Fri Apr 10 2020, 08:45

boltonbonce

boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Not really up on table tennis, but I know Desmond Douglas.

100World Ping Pong Championships - Page 5 Empty Re: World Ping Pong Championships Fri Apr 10 2020, 09:50

Ten Bobsworth


El Hadji Diouf
El Hadji Diouf

boltonbonce wrote:Not really up on table tennis, but I know Desmond Douglas.
That's him. Sounds like a reggae artist but Desmond was eleven time English TT champion and former doubles partner of football agent (boooh), Sky Andrew.

The other one is another former English TT champion, Trevor Taylor in his long-haired younger days and more recently.

The group Half Man Half Biscuit, featured Chester Barnes in the lyrics of this song.

I understand they were Trashmere Rovers supporters (boooh) but John Peel apparently thought they were the bees knees.

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