I'm in love with a Prostitute

He's here all week folks!

When I was stationed in Germany, two singlies went on the beer, followed by a visit to a knocking shop, by which time they had not enough cash to pay. The ladies accepted a cheque , (good mate to pay for your legover !). The next morning the cheque-writer went into the bank to cancel the cheque. Unfortunately, for him, the bank said it was a legitimate purchase, and let it go through. Any 'problems' with bank accounts were flagged up to the Regiment, (an unusual set-up, but this was down to our Pay Sargeant, who was later jailed for fraud), and the writer appeared in front of The Sargeant Major, to explain his reasons for the info from the bank. The only problem was that the SM was his prospective Father-in-Law, whose daughter was pregnant. Strangely, he received a week in jail, for a minor misdemeanour, was beasted mercilesly during his internment, and had the engagement broken off. ... Moral of the story ?, make sure you pay when with a a German girl !

Received the following text from Marie this morning, I'm definitely in love now:

missing u loads, cant wait 4 sunday, dont forget cash

That's two fingers to all you doubters, it's clear we have something. I'm going to with-hold sex from her on Sunday and see if she still likes me. If she does, I'm going to ask her out.

Quent wrote:
missing u loads, cant wait 4 sunday, dont forget cash

.

OK, now I know its a leg-pull, Excellently done

gloswhite wrote:

OK, now I know its a leg-pull, Excellently done

Think what you want my friend but this is no leg pull, the only reason I've been so open on here is no one knows who or where I am so it can't come back to bite me on the ass. She only mentioned the cash because the babysitters was insistant on payment upfront.

Quent, happy to be wrong on this one, and if so, go for it, and good luck.

Quent wrote:

Mr Magoo wrote:Well after reading all this bollock's, i have to say Quent, you are the biggest TIT i have come across in a long time.
This has to be a wind up, if not i hope you get everything you deserve.
Also when your having your nice day out, just think how many more men have been banging it in between your last visit nice.

Thanks for your kind words Mr Magoo, we're not all as lucky as you with women. But I'm going to stick with it, I know we can make a go of it - surely everyone has done a job they're not proud of. I once worked in Burger King. And I'll guarantee you this Mr Magoo, the woman I'll be bedding on Sunday is a hundred times hotter than the dried up old prune you'll be shacked up with.

dried up old prune my arse, she is lovely, and all mine unlike your old spunk bucket. you could always start the conversation of with, what did you do last night my love.

Quent wrote:Received the following text from Marie this morning, I'm definitely in love now:

missing u loads, cant wait 4 sunday, dont forget cash

That's two fingers to all you doubters, it's clear we have something. I'm going to with-hold sex from her on Sunday and see if she still likes me. If she does, I'm going to ask her out.

A very exciting development. And £100 for 3 hours of baby sitting is very fair, it is a Sunday after all.

Aside from today's game, finding out how your date went is going to be the most highly anticipated event on this board of the weekend. Love conquers all.

largehat wrote:

Quent wrote:Received the following text from Marie this morning, I'm definitely in love now:

missing u loads, cant wait 4 sunday, dont forget cash

That's two fingers to all you doubters, it's clear we have something. I'm going to with-hold sex from her on Sunday and see if she still likes me. If she does, I'm going to ask her out.

A very exciting development. And £100 for 3 hours of baby sitting is very fair, it is a Sunday after all.

Aside from today's game, finding out how your date went is going to be the most highly anticipated event on this board of the weekend. Love conquers all.

Or in his case a hand full of cash.

Don't forget cash! Who said that romance was dead?

It's difficult to get across how our relationship is on here, I understand why people are skeptical. She's an escort so she's going to milk me and every other punter for as much as she can - but if you could meet her you'd know why I get the feeling she wants out. If I have to shell out a few quid to get that happy ending then so be it.

Relationship ? It sounds more like a business transaction to me.

Reebok Trotter wrote:Relationship ? It sounds more like a business transaction to me.

Business transactions don't text you at 3am to tell you they're looking forward to seeing you on Sunday.

Just don't forget the cash or she will break your heart.

I wish you luck Quent, she seems like a lovely girl

This thread is Immortal. I hope it never ends. Quent, I salute you.

It will all end in tears once his bankroll has run out.

3am? Hhmmm.

Has she not got any friends or family that could babysit for her? Still sounds like she is trying to make money out of you. Sorry for sounding cynical and hope it works out for you.

Quent, make sure we get the full story on your date with Marie, I can't wait.