Bonce's own personal thread. Volume IX

Out for delivery.

I hope it gets delivered to the right address, Boncey.
A couple of weeks ago on a Friday evening a man knocked on the front door of Bobsworth Towers.
“Do you have a red door at the back”,he asked
As if we’d even countenance the idea of a red door at Bobsworth.
Anyway he was trying to track down a parcel needed for a wedding and showed me a photo on his phone of the door in question.
I  recognised the colour of the door instantly and walked with him to point out the house that had a front door exactly that distinctly tasteless colour. He’d come from about a mile away and was parked right outside it. He didn’t say if he’d knocked on that door first and I didn’t tell him about the mystery of the missing Christmas tree but it’s a house that gets an uncommonly number of deliveries.

Ten Bobsworth wrote:I hope it gets delivered to the right address, Boncey.
A couple of weeks ago on a Friday evening a man knocked on the front door of Bobsworth Towers.
“Do you have a red door at the back”,he asked
As if we’d even countenance the idea of a red door at Bobsworth.
Anyway he was trying to track down a parcel needed for a wedding and showed me a photo on his phone of the door in question.
I  recognised the colour of the door instantly and walked with him to point out the house that had a front door exactly that distinctly tasteless colour. He’d come from about a mile away and was parked right outside it. He didn’t say if he’d knocked on that door first and I didn’t tell him about the mystery of the missing Christmas tree but it’s a house that gets an uncommonly number of deliveries.

Judging by their online reviews, it may be an issue.
Some people have found their parcels at the end of the street, or on top of a wheelie bin. The reviews are so consistently bad I wonder how they've managed to stay in business.Hope they ring the bell. Some of the buggers think they're on a police raid. I'm not deaf.

Why is my life always like this.

Look what just turned up. Delivered by a bloke who'd received them in Runcorn!!

boltonbonce wrote:Look what just turned up. Delivered by a bloke who'd received them in Runcorn!!

Nice…

I've bought some new slippers. They're arriving tomorrow. I treasure these moments.

Just got in from a nice walk to find that I've trodden in something unspeakable. Maybe I'll be lucky.

Not happy after Tranmere loss, but my new record player is taking my mind off it.

Just been reading about Dalway Walkington, an Irish rugby player in the 1880/90's.
He often played wearing a monocle, only removing it when required to make a tackle.
I think modern sport would be improved no end if participants sported monocles. Let's push for it old bean.

boltonbonce wrote:Just been reading about Dalway Walkington, an Irish rugby player in the 1880/90's.
He often played wearing a monocle, only removing it when required to make a tackle.
I think modern sport would be improved no end if participants sported monocles. Let's push for it old bean.

Don’t you think referees should wear monocles, Boncey?
How about managers wearing spats too?
Bring about a greater sense of decorum, wouldn’t it?

Ten Bobsworth wrote:
Don’t you think referees should wear monocles, Boncey?
How about managers wearing spats too?
Bring about a greater sense of decorum, wouldn’t it?

Count me in. I'd add a cape. Can't beat a cape. And a cane.

His mother must be so proud.

Randy Newman in 2017.

Brilliant!

Funny!

But very scary too.

Dutch Decoy going in the 3.40 at Newmarket. I took the 66/1 on offer at Bet365. Worth a punt each way.

Hi Bonce, I've come on here to tell you that DD was running today, but you've beaten me to it.

Great price, big field but sure worth a punt at that price.

I'm just waiting for a district nurse arriving to disconnect me from my 46 hour Chemo pump that followed my 5 hour session in hospital on Thursday.

I'll probably be bungee jumping off Blackpool tower this afternoon if it stays fine.

Just put £5 on each way 100-1 worth a punt