Swan Retires

Fucking hell Swann you gutless coward. Where's your fight man. First serious setback in his career in International cricket as the Aussies go after him and club him to all parts. So he retires from cricket pronto leaving an already struggling England squad in the lurch. Symptomatic of why we are getting bullied and thrashed embarrassingly in Oz at the moment. Jump on the next plane home Swanny you fucking ponce.

He is getting on and has had his injury problems, so that could be part of it.

However, 'with immediate effect' sounds like a bit of a 'toy throwing out of the pram' session.

It's time for the can't bat can't field Monty to shine (he can bowl a bit though).

What a crappy way for Swann to hang his whites up.

He should have stuck it out like a man. What a mard arse.

I'm not just saying this because we've lost the Ashes, but there are a few in that team that I just don't like.

Swann's always struck me as a bit of an arrogant knob.

Pietersen let himself down over the captaincy debacle and that text message business.

And I've never liked Broad. There's something a bit sinister about him.

And I don't rate him as a bowler on flat pitches. He's got no variation.

In fact, there's only Jimmy I actually like and he's from Burnley, so even he's not perfect....

Absolute fucking garbage tonight.

How did we go from being No1 in the world to being the Heaton CC Ladies' 3rd XI in about 10 weeks?

Gutless wankers!

(Especially Swann....)

Looking a bit better at lunch with us taking a couple of wickets and reducing them to 39-2. Getting really worried about Jimmy, he seems to have completely lost the ability to swing the ball and has posed relatively little threat all series.

Jimmy came to a bit in the end, although just like the rest of the team it's come three tests too late.

I'm liking Stokes though, he looks very sure of himself and it looks like we may have a proper all rounder on our hands here.

Swann is typical of the modern day sportsman - an utter ponce. Can you imagine Ian Botham retiring because he took a bit of shit?

Swann should marry David Ngog, a match made in heaven.

Right then.....

Nip this fella out then stick 300 on the board.

Bowl 'em out and regain a bit of dignity.

Like Copper I've been really impressed by Stokes. He plays like a seasoned campaigner rather than someone playing only his third Test. Also been very impressed with Carberry who I previously had down as a bottler on the big stage but he's looked really comfortable and always seems to have plenty of time. He's played Johnson as well as anybody and it's a shame he's already 32 years of age.

What a set of effing jokers.

It's pointless for most of them to get padded up.



WHITEWASH

Only KP showed any spunk. We can't keep relying on him.

Why the fuck am I watching this shit at ten past twelve on a Saturday night?

Do I seriously believe that we're going to take 9 Aussie wickets for less than 165 runs?

No, I don't........

They should all be shot at Heathrow when they get off that plane.

And Swann should be rounded up and bum-funked by a big black porn star.

Then shot.

Breadman wrote:Why the fuck am I watching this shit at ten past twelve on a Saturday night?

Do I seriously believe that we're going to take 9 Aussie wickets for less than 165 runs?

No, I don't........

They should all be shot at Heathrow when they get off that plane.

And Swann should be rounded up and bum-funked by a big black porn star.

Then shot.

There's a lot of "bum funking" going on today!   

Stop it.

Right now.......

Breadman wrote:Stop it.

Right now.......

  

I said stop it.

Put your placard down and go home.........

Send 'em home tomorrow. Fucking embarrassment.

What a great first session. The first proper bouncer of the series (Rankin) for England and the first LBW of the series.

Stokes has got two wickets and he can field a bit as well.

I know it's all over but I like the attitude of the new lads. I hope Borthwick gets a few wickets and then we can forget about Swann (not his career but just his input in this awful series).

Same old same old......

Ninety-odd for five becomes three hundred and something all out.

Then we lose a wicket cheaply before the close.

It'll be us all out for about 150, they stick another 300 on fairly quickly and we're bowled out for about 275 inside four days.......

Poor show and it's time for a complete overhaul and start re-building for the future.