Halloween...? Shove it up yer arse!

I'm fairly certain that I'm not the only miserable twat on here, so I'm expecting a good level of support on this one.

Halloween is a load of imported Yanky bollocks, which is solely designed to relieve the gullible of their cash. (Like text voting for your favourite X Factor nobody, but that's a different rant.)

Gangs of surly teenagers with football scarves wrapped round their faces, as they demand money off you with the veiled threat of violence if you tell 'em to shove off ain't my idea of something we should be promoting in Britain in 2013.

And a steady procession of three year olds all dressed up as "scary fairies", tramping up my path and disturbing my evening is only slightly less annoying.

Anyway, I'll be locking my front door tonight as soon as I get home and I'm not opening it for anybody. Fuck 'em. It's double Corrie and they can all kiss my arse.

Totally agree Breadman.

Not a fan of this bullshit either.

I bloody hate it as well, luckily it's my Mums Birthday so i take her out and miss the annoying buggers.

wessy wrote:I bloody hate it as well, luckily it's my Mums Birthday so i take her out and miss the annoying buggers.

Ive always wanted to stand in the front bedroom at the window with a bucket of water for when they knock on my front door the little shits

Water's for pussies.

Use bleach.

Radioactive bleach.

With shit in it.

I wont be back tonight. 

Hunting is on the agenda, followed by (hopefully) a good roast bird followed by a few beers. 

THATS the way to spend Halloween.

I like Halloween and usually have a party, having a break from it this year though...

Don't just sit there laughing, do it, man.

I want to hear a report of it on Granada Reports tomorrow.

Living in the penthouse at Whittam Towers I have never had to endure trick or treaters. They never get past the doorman.

I've taken my nephew trick or treating a couple times. It's funny how it's always the posh bastards round Markland Hill that don't answer the door.

When I was in Tabley one year I left the gates open on purpose ant taped a sharp tack to the bell fuckin laugh or what blood all over it then let the dogs out when they got stroppy and watched them run.

You got to get into the spirit of it.

Angry Dad wrote:You got to get into the spirit of it.

 

I'm looking forwards to tonight, i'm dressing up as Michael Myers and my trick is to pull out a big axe and hack my partner in crime to bits, ketchup everywhere, he'll be fitting on the floor and everything, its going to be really good.

Hopefully i'll get enough for eight Kronenbourg 1664.

Pop up on my front door and you'll get your fake axe shoved up your shit box.

Sideways.

Breadman wrote:Pop up on my front door and you'll get your fake axe shoved up your shit box.

Sideways.

 

the only time I go round to your house is when you're at work to see your wife you miserable arsehole.

scottjames30 wrote:the only time I go round to your house is when you're at work to see your wife you miserable arsehole.

Yeah and she says "No I don't want my drive tarmacking, now go away you gypo twat."

scottjames30 wrote:the only time I go round to your house is when you're at work to see your wife you miserable arsehole.