Bonce's own personal thread. Volume II

karlypants wrote: I'm going to drag my arse out of bed in a min and put the kettle on.

Still in bed, lazy bastard! 

I notice the first thing you do when you open your eyes is log on to nuts. I think you need to take a break kp. 

karlypants wrote: I'm going to drag my arse out of bed in a min and put the kettle on.

I often do that,
Can't help feeling I look better in a cap though.

Morning KP.

Hmm....I find that a cap on my arse keeps falling off.....

okocha wrote:Hmm....I find that a cap on my arse keeps falling off.....

You should walk on all fours like I do.
Most of the time.

boltonbonce wrote:Morning all.
Just settling down to breakfast (big bag of Cheddars and a mug of Darjeeling tea) and perusing Betfair in preparation for a big win on the gg's this afternoon(I hope). 
Been keeping an eye on here though,and I must say,the behaviour is,as usual a disgrace. I'm thinking of coming back before Aug 1st just to add some much needed class.
And don't get lippy. As a rule of thumb,you shouldn't say anything to me that you couldn't safely say to John Wayne.
Think on.

Good morning.

I've been on my best behaviour

I'm taking it easy today because I've got an infected finger and it's swollen up and hurts like hell.

I went to Tesco last night to try and get some drawing ointment but they didn't have any, so I'm relying on Mrs B to find some in Bolton today.

When the girl behind the Pharmacy counter in Tesco said they didn't have any, for some bizarre reason I blurted out:

"Oh well, serves me right for sticking my finger up the dog's arse, I suppose."

Proper tumble-weed moment, as she (and the women in the queue behind me) looked at me like I'd just dropped my keks and shat on the floor.......

I really must learn to judge my audience better when firing off one-liners in public.

Bwfc1958 wrote:

karlypants wrote: I'm going to drag my arse out of bed in a min and put the kettle on.

Still in bed, lazy bastard! 

I notice the first thing you do when you open your eyes is log on to nuts. I think you need to take a break kp. 

One of my many addictions!

boltonbonce wrote:

karlypants wrote: I'm going to drag my arse out of bed in a min and put the kettle on.

I often do that,
Can't help feeling I look better in a cap though.

Morning KP.

Morning Boncey

It's nice to see you...

Breadman wrote:I'm taking it easy today because I've got an infected finger and it's swollen up and hurts like hell.

I went to Tesco last night to try and get some drawing ointment but they didn't have any, so I'm relying on Mrs B to find some in Bolton today.

When the girl behind the Pharmacy counter in Tesco said they didn't have any, for some bizarre reason I blurted out:

"Oh well, serves me right for sticking my finger up the dog's arse, I suppose."

Proper tumble-weed moment, as she (and the women in the queue behind me) looked at me like I'd just dropped my keks and shat on the floor.......

I really must learn to judge my audience better when firing off one-liners in public.

I often do things like that and then just go bright red and shuffle off

Breadman wrote:I'm taking it easy today because I've got an infected finger and it's swollen up and hurts like hell.

I went to Tesco last night to try and get some drawing ointment but they didn't have any, so I'm relying on Mrs B to find some in Bolton today.

When the girl behind the Pharmacy counter in Tesco said they didn't have any, for some bizarre reason I blurted out:

"Oh well, serves me right for sticking my finger up the dog's arse, I suppose."

Proper tumble-weed moment, as she (and the women in the queue behind me) looked at me like I'd just dropped my keks and shat on the floor.......

I really must learn to judge my audience better when firing off one-liners in public.

Keep an eye on it Breadders incase it's cellulitis.

y2johnny wrote:

boltonbonce wrote:Morning all.
Just settling down to breakfast (big bag of Cheddars and a mug of Darjeeling tea) and perusing Betfair in preparation for a big win on the gg's this afternoon(I hope). 
Been keeping an eye on here though,and I must say,the behaviour is,as usual a disgrace. I'm thinking of coming back before Aug 1st just to add some much needed class.
And don't get lippy. As a rule of thumb,you shouldn't say anything to me that you couldn't safely say to John Wayne.
Think on.

Good morning.

I've been on my best behaviour

Your best behaviour leaves much to be desired. I don't doubt you're responsible for KP wanting to wear a kettle. Kitchen utensils are not for wearing. (I exempt the humble colander of course.)
As for Bread.......

Cheers Karl.

I've just googled "Cellulitis finger" and the images look just like what I've got.

The NHS website says it can be quite serious and describes one of the symptoms as:

• changes in mental state, such as confusion
  
  

So it looks like I've had it for years......

Breadman wrote:Cheers Karl.

I've just googled "Cellulitis finger" and the images look just like what I've got.

The NHS website says it can be quite serious and describes one of the symptoms as:

• changes in mental state, such as confusion
  
  

So it looks like I've had it for years......

I think bonce has it too then

boltonbonce wrote:

y2johnny wrote:

boltonbonce wrote:Morning all.
Just settling down to breakfast (big bag of Cheddars and a mug of Darjeeling tea) and perusing Betfair in preparation for a big win on the gg's this afternoon(I hope). 
Been keeping an eye on here though,and I must say,the behaviour is,as usual a disgrace. I'm thinking of coming back before Aug 1st just to add some much needed class.
And don't get lippy. As a rule of thumb,you shouldn't say anything to me that you couldn't safely say to John Wayne.
Think on.

Good morning.

I've been on my best behaviour

Your best behaviour leaves much to be desired. I don't doubt you're responsible for KP wanting to wear a kettle. Kitchen utensils are not for wearing. (I exempt the humble colander of course.)
As for Bread.......

I reached the one hundred mark again the other day. Kp had to keep cooling me down and encouraging me. It was a hard slog. And only about ten percent where editing other people's posts

You must be knackered.
I spent some of my time away reading (The Silk House by Anthony Horowitz,which I recommend to any Sherlock Holmes devotee)and gardening. Also took time out to pre order the new Harper Lee book. Got me excited that.

Breadman wrote:Cheers Karl.

I've just googled "Cellulitis finger" and the images look just like what I've got.

The NHS website says it can be quite serious and describes one of the symptoms as:

• changes in mental state, such as confusion
  
  

So it looks like I've had it for years......

There are some pretty gruesome pics when googling that but I have had cellulitis on a couple of occasions in the same finger once simply by biting my finger nail and the skin around it when stressed.

It is usually more common in older people but it can be quite serious and I know someone who lost half a finger through it and nearly died from it.

Mine started like the following pic where it is hot to touch and quite painful.

You will be pleased to know Bonce that I have bought a proper BBQ for when I go down south again in about a weeks time.

Have given up on them instant grass scorching barbies!

karlypants wrote:

Breadman wrote:Cheers Karl.

I've just googled "Cellulitis finger" and the images look just like what I've got.

The NHS website says it can be quite serious and describes one of the symptoms as:

• changes in mental state, such as confusion
  
  

So it looks like I've had it for years......

There are some pretty gruesome pics when googling that but I have had cellulitis on a couple of occasions in the same finger once simply by biting my finger nail and the skin around it when stressed.

It is usually more common in older people but it can be quite serious and I know someone who lost half a finger through it and nearly died from it.

Mine started like the following pic where it is hot to touch and quite painful.

That's the last time I have a medical with you kp. I think I'll book in with sluffy or btid from now on.

Bwfc1958 wrote:

karlypants wrote:

Breadman wrote:Cheers Karl.

I've just googled "Cellulitis finger" and the images look just like what I've got.

The NHS website says it can be quite serious and describes one of the symptoms as:

• changes in mental state, such as confusion
  
  

So it looks like I've had it for years......

There are some pretty gruesome pics when googling that but I have had cellulitis on a couple of occasions in the same finger once simply by biting my finger nail and the skin around it when stressed.

It is usually more common in older people but it can be quite serious and I know someone who lost half a finger through it and nearly died from it.

Mine started like the following pic where it is hot to touch and quite painful.

That's the last time I have a medical with you kp. I think I'll book in with sluffy or btid from now on.

Sluffys ok. Very gentle. Btid on the other hand. ...... Hes like the doctor or if human centipede

karlypants wrote:You will be pleased to know Bonce that I have bought a proper BBQ for when I go down south again in about a weeks time.

Have given up on them instant grass scorching barbies!

Good.
Don't forget to pack your blazer.