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Joke Thread

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201Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Sun Sep 30, 2012 10:55 pm

jayjay23

jayjay23
Tony Kelly
Tony Kelly

The martial arts one is funny! LOLLD.

_____________________________________


Peadophile Tablets - Take one every morning before breakfast, keep out of reach of children at all times.

202Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Sun Sep 30, 2012 10:57 pm

Reebok Trotter

Reebok Trotter
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

jayjay23 wrote:The martial arts one is funny! LOLLD.

_____________________________________


Peadophile Tablets - Take one every morning before breakfast, keep out of reach of children at all times.

Is that a government health warning ?

203Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Mon Oct 01, 2012 1:21 am

jayjay23

jayjay23
Tony Kelly
Tony Kelly

Please tell me you get it.

204Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Mon Oct 01, 2012 5:05 pm

gloswhite

gloswhite
Guðni Bergsson
Guðni Bergsson

Was the label also written in French?

205Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Mon Oct 01, 2012 7:32 pm

Spillthebeans

Spillthebeans
Nicolas Anelka
Nicolas Anelka

OneOinCoyle wrote:Before me and the misses had sex last night she said "if you turn the light out I'll let you put it up my arse"

With hindsight I should have let the bulb cool down first.

lol!

206Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Wed Oct 03, 2012 11:21 am

Reebok Trotter

Reebok Trotter
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Apparently the screen on the new iPhone5 is so big you don't have to scroll down to see where Liverpool are in the league.

207Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Wed Oct 03, 2012 11:34 am

WhiteBic

WhiteBic
Tony Kelly
Tony Kelly

Joke Thread - Page 11 The-iphone-10-tallest-iphone-yet

You need one of these to see where we are...

208Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Wed Oct 03, 2012 11:56 am

Reebok Trotter

Reebok Trotter
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

A Royal Marine has been stripped of his medals and thrown out of Afghanistan after testing positive for 4 banned substances.

Toothpaste, Mouthwash, Shampoo and Soap.

209Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Wed Oct 03, 2012 12:12 pm

Guest


Guest

I went to a traffic wardens funeral yesterday. It was a lovely service but just as the coffin was being lowered into the ground a voice from inside shouted "I'm not dead yet". The vicar sucked his teeth and shouted back "it's to late ,I've already done the paperwork"

210Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Thu Oct 04, 2012 1:02 pm

WhiteBic

WhiteBic
Tony Kelly
Tony Kelly

JJB go bust after launching the new "jimmy saville" tracksuit. Its an adult sized top, but you need to squeeze into kids bottoms!

211Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Thu Oct 04, 2012 1:17 pm

Natasha Whittam

Natasha Whittam
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Sick. Hang your head in shame.

212Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Tue Oct 09, 2012 2:56 pm

WhiteBic

WhiteBic
Tony Kelly
Tony Kelly

Amir Khan has announced today that he is going to fight undefeated Carlos Molina. I thought the Joke Thread was the best place for this comment.

213Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Wed Oct 10, 2012 12:11 am

BoltonTillIDie

BoltonTillIDie
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Did you know that 9/10 people enjoy Gang Rape!! affraid

214Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Sun Oct 14, 2012 11:34 am

Guest


Guest

After the row about sponsorship from Wonga, Alan Pardew has told his players to concentrate on football and give 4229%.

215Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Sun Oct 14, 2012 7:26 pm

bwfc71

bwfc71
Ivan Campo
Ivan Campo

BoltonTillIDie wrote:Did you know that 9/10 people enjoy Gang Rape!! affraid



And the other 1% knew Jonathan King, Paul Gadd and Jimmy Savile.

216Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Sun Oct 14, 2012 7:49 pm

Guest


Guest

Now on sale at IKEA in Ballymun, Dublin. LESBIAN beds, no nuts or screwing involved, it's all tongue and groove...

A Muslim has been shot in the head with a starting pistol; police say it's definitely race related...

Due to a water shortage in Ireland , Dublin swimming baths have announced they are closing lanes 7 and 8....

I got a letter from Screw Fix Direct thanking me for my interest, but explaining they were not a dating agency...

Paddy thought his new girlfriend might be the one but after looking through her knicker drawer and finding a nurse's outfit, a French maids outfit, and a police womans uniform, he finally decided if she can't hold down a job, she's not for him

I got sacked from my job as a bingo caller the other day. Apparently, 'A meal for two with a terrible view' isn't the best way to announce number 69

Paddy is doing some roofing work for Murphy. He nears the top of the ladder and starts shaking and going dizzy. He calls down to Murphy and says
"I tink I will ave to go home, I've come all over giddy and feel sick."
Murphy asks "Ave yer got vertigo?"
Paddy replies "No I only live round the corner."

After 100 years lying on the sea bed, Irish divers were amazed to find that the Titanics swimming pool was still full!

217Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Sun Oct 14, 2012 7:49 pm

Lyric Todkill

Lyric Todkill
Tony Kelly
Tony Kelly

bwfc71 wrote:
BoltonTillIDie wrote:Did you know that 9/10 people enjoy Gang Rape!! affraid



And the other 1% knew Jonathan King, Paul Gadd and Jimmy Savile.


Is that funny?

218Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Sun Oct 14, 2012 10:45 pm

Reebok Trotter

Reebok Trotter
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

A woman runs into a police station shouting ' Grape, Grape!'

The copper behind the counter says, ' Madam, don't you mean rape?'

The woman replies, ' No, there was a bunch of them.'

219Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Tue Oct 16, 2012 8:22 pm

Reebok Trotter

Reebok Trotter
Nat Lofthouse
Nat Lofthouse

Today my wife said she had a head cold. I said, " It's probably caused by you being overweight"

" How can being fat cause a cold ? " she asked.

I replied, " Because your head is never out of the fcuking fridge"

220Joke Thread - Page 11 Empty Re: Joke Thread Tue Oct 16, 2012 10:57 pm

aaron_bwfc

aaron_bwfc
Moderator
Moderator

lol!

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