HomeGuys, we’re arguing about nothing here. Bread is the one in the wrong and has been banned in that respect.
Let’s just move on.
Let’s just move on.
Joke Thread
+26
Norpig
Cajunboy
okocha
terenceanne
sunlight
Natasha Whittam
Leeds_Trotter
y2johnny
Angry Dad
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Bread2.0
karlypants
scottjames30
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whatsgoingon
xmiles
finlaymcdanger
Bwfc1958
boltonbonce
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30 posters
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262 Re: Joke Thread Mon Aug 19 2024, 16:07
Sluffy
Admin
Norpig wrote:No i don't condone what Breaders said to either of you which is why i said it was brutal. I've already said i didn't think it was funny.
Yes i have been friends with him in the past and have emailed him (particularly when my Mum died, as he had worked with her many years ago) but not had contact with him for a few years. That's why i said it was nice to see him on here, nothing more than that.
Brutal
adjective
- Savagely violent - "a brutal murder"
- Unpleasant or harsh - "the brutal morning light"
- Direct and without attempting to disguise unpleasantness - "the brutal honesty of his observations"
You've clarified now that you don't think it was funny what he said but using the word 'brutal' wasn't in itself a condemnation of what he posted 'harsh but fair' is a common saying for instance 'pulling no punches' is also another - both are derivatives of the meaning of the word 'brutal' and don't infer a negative context as per the examples shown in the definition of the word.
As I've said, you can be mates with anyone you like and you can dislike anyone you want - it doesn't bother me if you like me or not - this is only the internet and not real life.
Unfortunately there are plenty people who believe the internet really IS a part of their real life, and plenty looking for validations of themselves from complete strangers on social media because they can't get it in their everyday life, from real people and thus they need to seek it from other saddo's on a keyboard like themselves.
263 Re: Joke Thread Mon Aug 19 2024, 16:34
Whitesince63
Andy Walker
For crying out loud Sluffy, this is supposed to be a joke thread, can’t we at least try to find a bit of humour instead of explaining dictionary meanings of words included in perfectly civil replies? Why can’t you just ignore what you consider idiots like the rest of us do. As for lusty, you accuse me of being a racist too, a knuckle dragger, a climate denier plus many other things, none of which are true. If that’s your perception that’s fine, it doesn’t bother me but just accept others have different views and express them. Chill out mate and you’re right we all find different things funny. I’m very much a Bernard Manning type myself but no doubt I’d be banished for being racist if I posted some of his? 
264 Re: Joke Thread Mon Aug 19 2024, 17:26
Sluffy
Admin
No, I'm a Bernard Manning fan myself, even been to see him live.
He was brilliant.
Thing is though, what you and people like Wanderlust fail to remember is that was the best part of fifty years ago and the world has moved on since.
Once upon a time we thought nothing of sticking children up chimneys to clean them, or denying women the right to vote or colonising other peoples countries but those days have gone and so to have laughing at people simply because they are black (or Welsh in Wanderlust case) or having fear and hatred towards Muslims (if the cap fits!).
I don't remember claiming that I didn't accept others having a different sense of humour to mine - in fact I didn't - what I did say was I laugh at the behaviour of those who clearly seek some sort of validation from anyone off the internet because they clearly aren't getting any from those in their real life.
I laugh at the likes of Breadman, each year coming back on here to abuse me because he clearly can't move on with his life and I laugh at Wanderlust needing to tell lies on social media to a bunch of strangers.
Now that is clearly odd and unstable behaviour and shows that something is clearly lacking in their life's.
And yet they really believe that I'M the one with the issues...!!!
He was brilliant.
Thing is though, what you and people like Wanderlust fail to remember is that was the best part of fifty years ago and the world has moved on since.
Once upon a time we thought nothing of sticking children up chimneys to clean them, or denying women the right to vote or colonising other peoples countries but those days have gone and so to have laughing at people simply because they are black (or Welsh in Wanderlust case) or having fear and hatred towards Muslims (if the cap fits!).
I don't remember claiming that I didn't accept others having a different sense of humour to mine - in fact I didn't - what I did say was I laugh at the behaviour of those who clearly seek some sort of validation from anyone off the internet because they clearly aren't getting any from those in their real life.
I laugh at the likes of Breadman, each year coming back on here to abuse me because he clearly can't move on with his life and I laugh at Wanderlust needing to tell lies on social media to a bunch of strangers.
Now that is clearly odd and unstable behaviour and shows that something is clearly lacking in their life's.
And yet they really believe that I'M the one with the issues...!!!
265 Re: Joke Thread Tue Aug 20 2024, 11:36
Whitesince63
Andy Walker
So you don’t think people of colour or other cultures make jokes about us then Sluffy? Of course they do but of course that’s not racist is it, you have to be non white for it to be labelled that. When the French call us Roast Beef, is that not racist but if it is who gives a f—k? I know it was fifty years ago and the world has changed immeasurably (sadly) since then into a completely homogenised mess of people who have to find something to be offended about whilst sops like you make excuses for them. Comedy, or lack of it, is just another indicator of the sad state of our world we’re brainwashing our kids with today alongside the fears of a burning planet and guilt in our history. You and people like you should be ashamed of yourselves, you should know better but sadly you’ve been indoctrinated with the rubbish too and the saddest thing of all is you just can’t see it.
267 Re: Joke Thread Tue Aug 20 2024, 14:52
Sluffy
Admin
Whitesince63 wrote:So you don’t think people of colour or other cultures make jokes about us then Sluffy? Of course they do but of course that’s not racist is it, you have to be non white for it to be labelled that. When the French call us Roast Beef, is that not racist but if it is who gives a f—k? I know it was fifty years ago and the world has changed immeasurably (sadly) since then into a completely homogenised mess of people who have to find something to be offended about whilst sops like you make excuses for them. Comedy, or lack of it, is just another indicator of the sad state of our world we’re brainwashing our kids with today alongside the fears of a burning planet and guilt in our history. You and people like you should be ashamed of yourselves, you should know better but sadly you’ve been indoctrinated with the rubbish too and the saddest thing of all is you just can’t see it.
Let me tell you a true story.
I joined a local council after leaving school.
Unfortunately for me I missed my A levels due to having glandular fever and back in my day there were no re-sits in a few months time, I either had to go back to school for another year or leave and find a job.
I had no choice really, I came from a poor family and even at the age I was, I could see the financial sacrifice my parents were making just to put me through my A levels and a further year to take the exam plus going on to university was not worth the hardship my mam and dad would have to make and I was not prepared to let them do that for me.
Instead I knuckled down at work and went to night school to first get my ONC, then my HNC and then on to my professional qualification.
I worked hard for what I achieved and I was rewarded for this at work by quickly rising up the ranks with a number of promotions.
So much so that I was promoted to head a regional office of the council I worked for - the problem was the people at that office wanted one amongst them to be their boss and went out of the way to make me unwelcome.
I'd never experienced hate before - but I wasn't going to give into it.
Whether they liked me or not I had authority over them and knew I was promoted into that job because my 'rival' at that office simply wasn't up to doing it otherwise they would have been appointed to it.
Every morning when I walked into the office and said hello, I was greeted with silence.
It shook me at first, apart from work matters, I was not spoken to.
Well I'm made of sterner stuff than that, if they didn't want to make me welcome, then fuck them.
BUT I did make one decision at the time, that I've lived by ever since and that was, that I wouldn't act to them in the way they acted to me - I wouldn't be brought down to their level.
Because if I did come down to their level it would mean that I'm just the same as them - doing the things they do - which I knew was wrong.
I was brought up better than that, I stood up to what I knew was right and not simply join in with everyone else like the sheep they were - some of whom did know better but they preferred to fit in with the rest of the group rather than stand up and say why are we against him simply because he isn't like one of us?
From that second or third day or so, every time I walked in, in the morning I would say hello - and was met with silence.
I hung my coat up sat at my desk then addressed everyone of them at a time, by name, saying good morning to them.
I put them on the spot.
Some mumbled good morning back, some pretended they were busy or hadn't heard me so I let that go - until the next day - and the one after that, and the one after that, until they all got the message and all said good morning when I first walked in from then on.
In the end I won most of them over, they saw that I knew my job, was always there to help them do theirs, and I didn't hold any grievance over the way they had treated me.
My point to all this is that unless you show people the right way to co-exist by leading by example, nothing will ever change.
I'll tell you a further true story as well.
When my daughter was little she went to a play group a couple of days a week.
She played with other little boys and girls, some of whom were black or Asian, Muslim or Jewish, even one who was handicapped.
The thing I noticed was that they all played together.
My point being here is that racism, religious divide and excluding of people different to you IS NOT inside anyone when they are born - it is instilled in us by our parents or teachers and the culture we are brought up in.
Humour if you like is a mantra. it can be repetitive and you begin to repeat it to others.
If all you ever here is jokes about black people, or the Irish, or gingers, or whoever, then that starts to become self reinforcing about how you see them - stereotyping them - humour in this way does not break down barriers, it puts up barriers instead.
Do I care about people calling me names - no I don't - but look at how many on here judge me because people like Breadman and Wanderlust have constantly abused me and deliberately tried to ridicule me.
I can't stop people hating - you clearly hate too W63 although you can't see it - but your actions and words expose your right wing ideological, indoctrinated hatred.
Just because people want to put me down by use of humour (more like personal hatred from some) doesn't mean that I should sink down to their basic level.
Isn't it better by words and actions to breakdown the divide amongst us all rather than sit in our own tribes hating everyone who isn't one of us?
It's ignorance and stupidity I laugh at, not because 'chalky' is a 'blacky' or 'Abdul' is obviously a 'Muslim bomber'.
I'm the one who can see a better future for us all - unfortunately all you can see is turning the clock back to when the blacky's belonged in Bongo-Bongo land and the paki's should all go back home on the banana boat - but the world is not like that anymore - we've moved on - but you never will - you are stuck in a past that no longer exists outside your head.
I get the impression that you somehow think I don't like a good laugh?
Well I do - I always think of this song when I read your posts for instance...
Kia Ora.
268 Re: Joke Thread Wed Aug 21 2024, 12:13
Whitesince63
Andy Walker
You were doing so well there Sluffy and I was agreeing with every word of what you said but you just can’t help spoiling everything with your following ridiculous and wide of the mark insults. Sluffy, one thing I hate intensely is the use of the word hate. I actually can’t think of a single thing in this world that I hate. There are many things I dislike, resent and a myriad of other descriptions but not one thing that I hate. I personally never use that word which seems to come so naturally to you which I find very sad. It is actually you who is filled with hate and that’s clear from what you write. I don’t know you Sluffy but I get the flavour of you by looking behind what you post, read between the lines and I see someone who lacks belief in themselves and who always has to win any argument. Someone who believes their view is always right and anyone who disagrees must be a knuckle dragger, a denier or be hate filled. That word again. Nobody will ever convince you of anything sluffy because you’re too set in your ways and beliefs. I find that’s sad because underneath I also think you’re a pretty genuine guy. As for me, I’m nowhere near a racist, not a climate denier and certainly don’t have a closed mind like you. One thing I’ll never be convinced of though is that this country wasn’t altogether better in the fifties than it is today for so many reasons. You keep having your beliefs and I’ll keep having mine but just try to accept that sometimes those beliefs will be different and as long as we believe them that’s all that matters and doesn’t mean were anything like the labels you like to throw out.
269 Re: Joke Thread Wed Aug 21 2024, 13:44
Sluffy
Admin
Whitesince63 wrote:You were doing so well there Sluffy and I was agreeing with every word of what you said but you just can’t help spoiling everything with your following ridiculous and wide of the mark insults. Sluffy, one thing I hate intensely is the use of the word hate. I actually can’t think of a single thing in this world that I hate. There are many things I dislike, resent and a myriad of other descriptions but not one thing that I hate. I personally never use that word which seems to come so naturally to you which I find very sad. It is actually you who is filled with hate and that’s clear from what you write. I don’t know you Sluffy but I get the flavour of you by looking behind what you post, read between the lines and I see someone who lacks belief in themselves and who always has to win any argument. Someone who believes their view is always right and anyone who disagrees must be a knuckle dragger, a denier or be hate filled. That word again. Nobody will ever convince you of anything sluffy because you’re too set in your ways and beliefs. I find that’s sad because underneath I also think you’re a pretty genuine guy. As for me, I’m nowhere near a racist, not a climate denier and certainly don’t have a closed mind like you. One thing I’ll never be convinced of though is that this country wasn’t altogether better in the fifties than it is today for so many reasons. You keep having your beliefs and I’ll keep having mine but just try to accept that sometimes those beliefs will be different and as long as we believe them that’s all that matters and doesn’t mean were anything like the labels you like to throw out.
Don't give up the day job 63 because you certainly can't analyse people from what they write on social media if you honestly believe your conclusions about me.
Your biggest failing if I may say so is that you misinterpret what I write as analysis as being my beliefs, behaviour and values - they are simply not the same. I'm 'fact' driven, not 'emotionally' driven.
Using Wanderlust as an example, he was the one if you remember ceaselessly posted his anger about Brexit, was caught out in several lies, often made stuff up (70 odd year old and bettering grown men 50 years his junior, twice a week at football, for instance) - these are remarks from someone who acts on his emotions and is seeking attention and validation that he is lacking away from the internet.
I on the other hand am more cold hearted, rational and clinical. I analyse and dissect, I don't fly off at the handle nor take much to heart.
I don't seek anything from the internet, I just use it for my amusement and to help and inform anyone on here if they want to really know what is actually going on rather than the echo chambers they listen to such as you with the right wing broadcaster GB News.
The hatred I talk about is not that from me but how it influences the underclasses of society to riot in the street as we have seen recently.
This 'stirring up' of hatred is done deliberately by the right wing simply in order get people (like you) to vote them into power.
It is Trumpism, Putinism, Xiism, a ploy to basically to divide and conquer, to become autocracies, it leads to dictatorism, the social 'enslavement' of the masses.
I know all this is too highbrow for you to want to comprehend but at its simplest people are led to hate anyone who isn't like them.
Every action causes an equal and opposite reaction and that is the 'wokeism', the transsexual rights stuff gluing yourself to the M25 to 'just stop oil' and taking the knee virtue signalling, empty gestures.
It's the extremism of both sides that fuels the other.
You, although you can't see it, have become part of it believing more and more extremist right wing ideology, I am just an observer, I don't buy into either side - I keep telling everyone I'm not political - both sides are as bad as each other - they both simply want political power and once they have it, to retain it for good.
I don't have any skin in the game, as they say, I can't stop the inevitable drift away from the centre - I just tell everyone who may want to listen what the real truth is (and that includes this period of global warming is directly man made through the burning of fossil fuel and the protectory of the rise is off the chart).
And finally I'm often right about most things, not because I'm especially clever but simply because I don't believe anything on social media or GB News without checking it out for myself first. I even post up the links to the facts too!
If you bothered to do the same you would be vastly better informed and make better decisions than slavishly following the right wing propaganda that you currently do.
But you won't.
You've already gone too far down that path.
For instance, even if the country was better in the fifties, the fifties have gone. We live seven decades on from then now.
You wish and desire for something that no longer exists, a dream, a false utopia.
Look to the future not the past.
Use your brain and not your emotions.
270 Re: Joke Thread Wed Aug 21 2024, 14:59
wanderlust
Nat Lofthouse
Well finally something interesting.
Sluffy's potted life history explains so much and although I already knew about his career, such as it is having tracked him down years ago when he first started trolling me, I had no idea that the chip on the shoulder, sense of rejection and bitterness in the workplace went back so far. Totally explains the obnoxious attitude.
FWIW, I haven't played football for the last couple of weeks - it's the school holidays and a lot of the lads now have young kids so we've been struggling to get enough numbers - irritating as we still have to pay for the pitch. Hopefully back on Friday but I'm not holding out much hope until the holidays are over and the little darlings are back in school.
Sluffy's potted life history explains so much and although I already knew about his career, such as it is having tracked him down years ago when he first started trolling me, I had no idea that the chip on the shoulder, sense of rejection and bitterness in the workplace went back so far. Totally explains the obnoxious attitude.
FWIW, I haven't played football for the last couple of weeks - it's the school holidays and a lot of the lads now have young kids so we've been struggling to get enough numbers - irritating as we still have to pay for the pitch. Hopefully back on Friday but I'm not holding out much hope until the holidays are over and the little darlings are back in school.
271 Re: Joke Thread Wed Aug 21 2024, 15:10
Sluffy
Admin
Hahaha.
You need to stay in your day job also if you believe your analysis of me is correct too!
Believe what you want of course but I'm not the one who tells lies on the internet and I'm not the one trying so, so hard to convince complete strangers off the internet that you run rings round grown men fifty years your junior at football.
You need to stay in your day job also if you believe your analysis of me is correct too!
Believe what you want of course but I'm not the one who tells lies on the internet and I'm not the one trying so, so hard to convince complete strangers off the internet that you run rings round grown men fifty years your junior at football.
272 Re: Joke Thread Wed Aug 21 2024, 15:28
wanderlust
Nat Lofthouse
I don't run rings round them. They do all the running and I kick themSluffy wrote:Hahaha.
You need to stay in your day job also if you believe your analysis of me is correct too!
Believe what you want of course but I'm not the one who tells lies on the internet and I'm not the one trying so, so hard to convince complete strangers off the internet that you run rings round grown men fifty years your junior at football.
273 Re: Joke Thread Wed Aug 21 2024, 15:46
Norpig
Nat Lofthouse
i think you need to post a video on here next time you play Lusty. Ask one of the young'uns to do it as your Nokia brick won't have video 
274 Re: Joke Thread Wed Aug 21 2024, 16:13
Sluffy
Admin
wanderlust wrote:I don't run rings round them. They do all the running and I kick themSluffy wrote:Hahaha.
You need to stay in your day job also if you believe your analysis of me is correct too!
Believe what you want of course but I'm not the one who tells lies on the internet and I'm not the one trying so, so hard to convince complete strangers off the internet that you run rings round grown men fifty years your junior at football.
You wouldn't be even doing that at seventy years old...
Really why do you do it, who are you trying to impress?
Nobody believes you - you must know that?
I packed football in in my mid-fifties, when my body simply couldn't take the knocks anymore.
If you claimed you were a goalkeeper in say half hour, 5-a-side games, you would have been more believable but you come on here claiming you hold your own and better most of the players you play with in two, hour long games a week and even tell us that the youngest was 18 years old, over 50 years your junior.
You just tell lie after lie - you say you didn't vote for Brexit - but you told ww that you did. You said you weren't the person behind the Hoppy510 account on ww then (rather stupidly of you) some months later changed the name of this account to 'Wanderlust' - you claim you play football at 70 years old...
Yeah right, I wouldn't want you or anyone else on my team who are in their seventies - no one would, unless they felt completely obligated to do so.
Liar, liar pants on fire and all that.
275 Re: Joke Thread Wed Aug 21 2024, 16:16
Sluffy
Admin
Norpig wrote:i think you need to post a video on here next time you play Lusty. Ask one of the young'uns to do it as your Nokia brick won't have video
Yeah go on - full match.
276 Re: Joke Thread Wed Aug 21 2024, 17:37
karlypants
Nat Lofthouse
Sluffy wrote:wanderlust wrote:I don't run rings round them. They do all the running and I kick themSluffy wrote:Hahaha.
You need to stay in your day job also if you believe your analysis of me is correct too!
Believe what you want of course but I'm not the one who tells lies on the internet and I'm not the one trying so, so hard to convince complete strangers off the internet that you run rings round grown men fifty years your junior at football.
You wouldn't be even doing that at seventy years old...
Really why do you do it, who are you trying to impress?
Nobody believes you - you must know that?
I packed football in in my mid-fifties, when my body simply couldn't take the knocks anymore.
If you claimed you were a goalkeeper in say half hour, 5-a-side games, you would have been more believable but you come on here claiming you hold your own and better most of the players you play with in two, hour long games a week and even tell us that the youngest was 18 years old, over 50 years your junior.
You just tell lie after lie - you say you didn't vote for Brexit - but you told ww that you did. You said you weren't the person behind the Hoppy510 account on ww then (rather stupidly of you) some months later changed the name of this account to 'Wanderlust' - you claim you play football at 70 years old...
Yeah right, I wouldn't want you or anyone else on my team who are in their seventies - no one would, unless they felt completely obligated to do so.
Liar, liar pants on fire and all that.
And how do you know he's not 69?
Wanderlust has explained on here in the past his body is a temple so should be in top form.
Mel Harvey from Benidorm springs to mind!
277 Re: Joke Thread Wed Aug 21 2024, 19:00
boltonbonce
Nat Lofthouse
My body, too, is a temple. It's falling to bits.
278 Re: Joke Thread Wed Aug 21 2024, 20:25
karlypants
Nat Lofthouse
boltonbonce wrote:My body, too, is a temple. It's falling to bits.
279 Re: Joke Thread Fri Aug 23 2024, 10:21
Whitesince63
Andy Walker
You’ve got to admit though, how many sites have two truly entertaining characters as Sluffy and lusty to enjoy jousting with? It wouldn’t be Nuts without them and bonces falling temple just brilliant. I’m actually glad I’m as thick and deluded as Sluffy claims because at least it means I’m not like him.
280 Re: Joke Thread Fri Aug 23 2024, 12:55
Sluffy
Admin
Whitesince63 wrote:You’ve got to admit though, how many sites have two truly entertaining characters as Sluffy and lusty to enjoy jousting with? It wouldn’t be Nuts without them and bonces falling temple just brilliant. I’m actually glad I’m as thick and deluded as Sluffy claims because at least it means I’m not like him.
I've got a brain...
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